Is it Bad behavior or Sensory Overload?

Does your child have sensory overload? Does he or she display anxiety, irritability, and restlessness, or avoiding specific places or situations, closing their eyes, covering the face, crying, placing their hands over their ears, the inability to converse with others, or connect to them. Do they run away from specific places or situations? Even going to the school or the cafeteria can lead to sensory overload. The sounds of people talking loudly, strong smells of food, and flickering fluorescent lights can trigger feelings of being overwhelmed and uncomfortable.

Do you feel hopeless because you do not have tools to soothe your child in stressful situations?

Your child may be suffering from a sensory processing disorder.
Most commonly found in children with autism spectrum disorder, fetal alcohol syndrome, Down syndrome, ADHD, and PTSD. However, a child with a Neurological condition such as Optic Nerve Hypoplasia (ONH), which affects their sight, can also include the sensory processing disorder. Having OHN was the case for my child. Some children will avoid interactions with peers, have a
difficult time holding a conversation, temper tantrums, overall seem withdrawn, and like quiet places. These are all symptoms of sensory processing problems and not just bad behavior by your child.

Below I have provided some tried and true small tips to help you and your child during sensory overload.

• Help your child avoid triggering situations. This was hard for me with my own child because would become frustrated when she did not want to participate in dance classes or talk to her friend or me. She would avoid conversations and lack emotional excitement when introduced to new experiences.

• Give your child the words to explain what is happening and how it feels. When I started to ask my child how she felt, she began to use the words “scared” or “afraid.” Once I knew how she was feeling, we could start to use self-soothing techniques such a deep breathing, etc..

• Validate the child’s feelings and experiences. Let them know you will always love and care for them, and it is okay to be scared sometimes.

• Inform teachers of the possibility of sensory overload and ask for their support in finding a safe place your child could go when he or she is feeling overwhelmed so they could use coping skills to help reduce the symptoms overload. Sometimes just a new placement in a classroom can help. These children should not be in the middle of the classroom. Aim for a corner or by a wall where they will have fewer children directly around them. This little change may provide your child with significant benefits.

• Seek professional help from an individual therapist to assist with coping skills and self-soothing techniques, talk your to child’s pediatrician and ask for a referral to an occupational therapist. Occupation therapists are excellent resources that can give you exercise to help with self-soothing and self-regulation.

Remember that your child is not trying to be difficult, but if you keep in mind “nails on a chalkboard, ”this sensation is often how your child experiences simple things such as talking or moving their desk at school. There is an actual change in the structure of the brain that makes responding to some daily tasks unbearable for these children. With guidance from your child’s medical teams, your child can learn how to respond better to the stimuli of the world around him.

6 Tips to Better Distance Learning for your Child

I was hoping back in March 2020 that before school started again in August, our kids would be back on campus and being able to play with their friends. Maybe I was a bit naive at the time, or perhaps it was just wishful thinking. As a therapist, I see all sorts of families that are struggling with this pandemic. It is not uncommon for people to feel at times scared, anxious, or depressed. We have adapted, but many miss their old life and some sense of control. It is hard for entire families to be at home for so long, and now with the school year starting, the added stress of distance learning is causing many parents to feel overwhelmed, tired, and helpless. 

Many of my parents tell me they are not good at teaching; that is why they became firefighters, nurses, salespeople, or assorted other occupations teachers because they didn’t have the patience to be in a room with 20 kids all asking questions and with the expectation to actually teach something useful. Nevertheless, here we are having to supplement our child’s learning and help them prepare for online schooling. 

Here are a few tips to help you and your child succeed this school year!

Know what the expectations are from the start. Know what your child is responsible for, what time, and what subjects your child will be doing each day. Keep in touch with your child’s teacher and read all the documents created for their learning. Most schools have some type of parent portal; make sure you have registered and are checking it frequently.

Remove distractions. This is often easier said than done. In many families, everyone is at home and there's competition for space on the computer. I have had a few families become super creative and have elevated beds to allow for floor space for a desk.  Others have used “the guest room” or formal living rooms to have a space for each child and working parent. An area that is quiet and comfortable is an absolute must. This one may require you to think way out of the box to get it done.

Limit device screen time. As school time will take up many hours during the day, adding more sitting and screen time from games or TV will create eye strain, inability to focus, and anxiety. The overuse of screen also can negatively affect our brains. Sitting for long periods of time is also not good for our bodies or our mental health. To help combat this, printing out some schoolwork to work on the “old school way” and reading books also helps reset and refresh our brains. Note: I am not saying no to any additional screen time, but do try to limit it. 

Move more! Our bodies were designed to move, and when we don’t, our health suffers. Set up a schedule to allow for recess and non-screen playtime. We all do better with schedules, and working in physical activity into the school or workday is essential. Also note that some children do better standing at their desk while distance learning, you may need to adjust the computer’s height if your student does better standing. 

Attempt to adjust your schedule. If you can take a break when your child does, it will help both of you get more done and you to be less stressed. Try scheduling breaks times and lunch during your child designated time. It will be less chaotic and more fun if you can eat together. Once break time is over, you both can resume your work. 

Sleep. Know how many hours your child should sleep?  The American Academy of Sleep Medicine (AASM) provides some helpful guidelines regarding just how much sleep your child needs depends on their age.  Children ages 6-12 should get 9 to 12 hours, and teens should be getting 8 to 10 hours nightly. We all learn better, have less mental distraction, better mood regulation, and frankly, we all easier to be around when we get the proper amount of sleep. Oh, and by the way, adults need at least 7 to 9 hours to be at our optimum performance.

We some planning, patience, and creativity we will all get through this new challenge. Some days will be easier than others. On those days, give yourself and your child a bit of grace and kindness, knowing that tomorrow will be a new day. 

Welcome to the new school year!

6 Tips For a GREAT School Year.

It’s the end of summer and we all know what that means; back to school!! From school supply shopping to back to school clothes shopping, it can get a little hectic. With these 6 tips, you are sure to have a great school year ahead of you not only for your child but for you as well. These are simple things that will make going back to school an easy transition.

1.      Set up that bedtime routine before school starts. It’s a good idea to set up the bedtime routine two weeks in advance so that way by the time school is ready to begin, your child is well rested and that will be just one less thing to worry about for school.

2.      Meet the teachers. Finding out who the teacher is ahead of time and sending out an introductory email or meeting with the teacher before open house. This is a great idea to connect with the teacher and build rapport before the school year starts that will carry you all the way through the school year.  

3.      Get those back to school supplies early. Ready..set..go!! once you have the list, take your child and have them participate and have an active role in helping to get their own school supplies. By letting them get that backpack, or giving them a choice of the pens or pencils or lunch box, back to school supply shopping can be a little fun and not such a big stress.

4.      Pack a healthy lunch. Sometimes this is easier said than done, but if you are able to, packing a well-balanced lunch for your child. We know kids don't always eat right, but picking favorite healthy foods helps your child eat better at school. Remember giving them the proper balance of protein, fruits and vegetables will help that brain power to ace that important test coming up.

5.      Talking about goals for the new school year. Sit down with your child so they understand the expectations for the new school year, whether it is being in sports, extracurricular activities, or homework schedules. Setting those goals up before school starts is a good way to help ensure they will get accomplished.

6.      Talk to your child about bullying. Bullying is on the rise and with social media is an ever growing concern with parents and children. Research shows that one in three children will be bullied in their school career. Talking to children before school starts on how they should treat their peers as well as what they should do if they encounter a bully is a great way to start the year off being kind to one another.

Remember if problems do arise in school and you need more assistance we are here to help support you and your child.

Courtney Whetstone, MFTI is a dedicated professional and advocate for children and teens. She has a vast experience helping children with school concerns. For more information on Courtney click here.