Anger Management is More than Managing Anger

Do you have anger issues? Take a look at this list of myths and decide for yourself. You can make a change with a professional trained in Anger Management and Emotional Intelligence. 

Myth 1: Anger is a primary feeling. 

Mental health professional, George Anderson, MSW, MCSW, CAMF, Certified EQ-i Examiner, states that “Anger is a secondary emotion. Some other feelings always come before anger. Frequently, anger is preceded by stress, anxiety, depression, burnout or fatigue. If the primary feeling can be identified, strategies for managing anger and enhancing self-awareness, social awareness, self-control, empathy and relationship management can be used.” 

Myth 2: I don’t have anger issues; I can control it. 

There is a cost to avoiding our feelings. Everyone has days that are frustrating and situations that may anger us; no one is exempt from strong feelings. Maybe you have the kind of temperament that does not lash out, yell or hit things but chances are the anger is impacting you in other ways. 

Are you having trouble sleeping? Has your eating been out of control or non-existent? Maybe you have lost interest in things that you usually enjoy. All of these behaviors are symptoms of feelings that you are keeping hidden and anger may be one of them. Even though it feels like you are in control, your feelings are controlling you through residual behaviors that may be destructive or harmful to you. 

Myth 3: I feel what I feel and I cannot change. 

It is true that you are allowed to feel what you feel. And it is also true that you may choose not to change but everyone has the capacity for change. If you are having angry outburst that you feel are out of control or impacting your life on a daily basis it may mean that there are underlying feelings that you need to address and it is possible for your behavior to change. 

You can address anger issues through awareness of feelings and thoughts and then changing the behavior. Use a professional that is going to help you develop communication skills, understand anger and learn to be in control. A skilled professional can also raise your emotional intelligence and provide skills for stress management, which also rolls into improvements in relationship management.

You see, Anger Management is more than managing anger - it’s a set of skills that you can master, with the right professional. 

The Anger Management & Emotional Intelligence program we lead is “designed to help individuals recognize and manage anger and stress.” One primary goal is to teach acceptable behaviors and ways to express anger through gaining an understanding of ourselves. Attendees will be taught exercises to try at home and also practice within a safe group atmosphere. The program also includes skill enhancement exercises from the BarOn EQ-i Emotional Intelligence coaching program. 

If you want to learn more about anger management contact us at Central Counseling Services and get signed up with one of our professionally run groups. 

Resources

https://andersonservices.com/- Mental health professional trainers on Anger Management https://www.aaamp.org/ - The American Association of Anger Management Providers Do I have anger issues? (https://www.healthline.com/health/anger-issues) https://www.hpsys.com/EI_BarOnEQ-I.htm- BarOn EQ-i Emotional Intelligence

Amanda Wilbur, ACSW

I provide counseling to individuals (adults and children) and couples. I’ve treated a wide range of challenges, mental health matters, adjustments to life’s hurts, and trauma.

Common trauma symptoms: panic attacks, chronic pain, rage, substance abuse, numbing, depression, nightmares, anxiety, and/or hopelessness.

When my loved one struggled with mental illness I received training and experience with leading classes for National Alliance on Mental Illness (NAMI) family programs and peer support groups. I am certified as an Anger Management Facilitator and SMART Recovery. Besides a Loma Linda University Master's degree, I have specialized training in Postpartum Support International’s Perinatal Mood Disorders Component of Care and Trauma-Focused Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CF CBT).

I love how the brain works (neuroscience), and how we are impacted through the body (somatic experiencing). I understand how lack of emotional control (dysregulation) can impact us and how attachment disorders affect our relationships. Traumatic events, past experiences, and unresolved issues can disrupt our daily living. An understanding of our body and brain physiology can help. When combined, psychotherapy and body-based or somatic therapy can promote wellness and resilience.

As a therapist, it is important to know how these symptoms work so that we can show compassion and use skills to help clients manage their stress and physical dysregulation. In this way, instead of a major eruption, clients can learn to have little system shocks in their body that are manageable and keep the build-up from happening. A trauma resiliency approach can return the natural rhythm of the nervous system to a resilient place and improve the integration of the brain and the body to a place of whole wellness.

My goal as a therapist is to provide a safe space where each person feels supported, encouraged, and also challenged to grow and build the life they want yet also feel equipped when challenges come up – because they will. They just do.